3 Things To Know About Therapy Before You Start
#1. There is no “one size fits all” answer to how long you’ll need to be in therapy.
I know starting therapy itself is already a vulnerable thing. And I understand it would be easier to have the exact day and time you’ll see that you’ve met all your treatment goals. But just as every human is uniquely different, in their life experiences, strengths, weaknesses, wounds, hopes, dreams, etc. the length of therapy is also unique to each individual or couple. Some clients experience growth and relief after just 3-5 sessions, and others have made progress within some treatment goals, but are still showing up 2 years later, as their treatment goals have shifted over time. As you start therapy, you and your therapist will keep a line of open communication regarding your treatment progress so that you feel aware of where YOU are within your therapy journey.
#2. Sometimes it can feel like things get “worse” before they get better.
Many times as clients begin to feel more comfortable in therapy and open up about things they’ve been through that perhaps they don’t usually talk about, something interesting happens. During the therapy session itself, you may experience a sense of relief, like you got some weight off your chest…and even walk away thinking “man that was a good session!” Before you know it, the next day comes and you’re feeling surprised at the fact that you’re not feeling as “good as you did yesterday,” and maybe even feel a little “off, little funky, or down or anxious.” The way I explain this to my clients is, if you’re just starting therapy, chances are you’ve been through painful experiences in your past that you didn’t feel like you quite had the time or tools to deal with. In order to keep surviving, you tucked away the painful experience in a sealed box in your mind and you kept trucking along. Therapy gives you the opportunity to finally have a consistent weekly space for yourself to slow down, and start carefully taking off the lids to those painful memory boxes. Although there is some relief in getting to finally let those boxes see the light of day and feel like you aren’t alone and misunderstood, it’s still painful opening them up. Painful but worth it, because as you’re willing to be brave enough to look at those moments of hurt, you’re also saying yes to walking down the journey of true hope and healing.
#3. Consistency. Consistency. Consistency.
It really is true what they say about “you’re going to get out what you’re willing to put in.” It’s no surprise that this also applies to your experience in therapy! Showing up consistently for your weekly appointments is the surest way of being able to accomplish what you started therapy to do in the first place. We all understand life emergencies happen, but I’m talking about the weeks where you feel like “ehhh I could just skip one,” or “I can’t really think of anything to talk about this week.” My experience as a therapist has often been that it’s the session where someone shows up “not having anything to talk about,” that ends being one of the most impactful! Therapy is an investment in yourself, your time, your mental well-being. At the end of the day, you are WORTH showing up for and your future self will so appreciate that you did.
